July 2024

Here is a little overview of all the things going on this month.

Private Practice

I have opened my private practice again and I will be offering Psychodynamic Counselling and EMDR Psychotherapy. I have 2 spots that are available at a lower cost for Queer Black people and I also am offering a discounted rate to Sex Workers.

My availability is quite open at the moment but I only have spots for 8 clients total so please feel free to get in touch with me  and we can arrange a first meeting 

Collaboration with Hydra eV

I am collaborating with Hydra eV an organization in Berlin that provides support to Sex Workers. This includes, Mental Health and sexual health Support but it is also a general community hub where people can connect, share knowledge, resources and advice and build community. I will be providing crisis counselling to those in need throughout the rest of the year. This support is short term up to 10 virtual sessions of counselling where we can explore what is happening, practice tools to stabilize and plan next steps together.  This is not a replacement for longer term therapy, but it is a useful resource for those in immediate need. Hydra works with all Sex Workers, but this program is specifically for those who are Black and Queer. You can reach hydra directly and request to work with me at Akutetraumahilfe at hydra-berlin.de

There are also other Therapists working with the program so you have options to see who resonates most with you. Please share this offering with someone that you know who could benefit. 

Collaboration with EOTO

Each One Teach One is an organisation based in Berlin that aims to build and support Black Community in a variety of ways. I have worked with them in the past and always enjoyed being able to come together with other Black people with the focus being building community and supporting our mental health and wellness. 

This month I am working with them on two events. 

One Is a relationship peer support group for Black and Queer people. This group is a safer and welcoming space for those who seek to discuss, share, and learn about the unique experiences of navigating relationships as Black and Queer people dating in Berlin. We will share, learn and explore not only relationships with others, but also our relationships with ourselves. 

You can register via the eventbrite link here

The other is A yoga series with a focus on Black Healing & Wellness. This is a beginner-friendly, three-part yoga series specifically designed to support Black mental health and well-being. This series aims to create a nurturing space where you can connect with your inner self, enhance your physical and mental health, and learn holistic practices for caring for both your individual and community well-being. In the first session we will focus on Grounding and self connection. We will start off with grounding techniques that connect you to your body and breath. And introduce foundational yoga poses and mindfulness practices to help you center yourself and build a solid base for mental and emotional stability. The first session is on July 25th and will be Thursday afternoons the following 2 weeks. I hope to see you there! 

You can register at the eventbrite here

Social Media

I am doing my best to stay engaged with social media and use this as a space to share more about what I have learned about EMDR and working with trauma, mental health in general and also aspects of yoga. These things have all positively influence my life and I hope to share them with you so that you can experience those benefits as well. I am on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook. 

Hope to connect with you somewhere soon!

Making a slow return

After a longer than expected pause from social media and all things Kemoy.de related I have now decided that its time for a comeback and a revamp. I don’t typically share much about myself in my work and this is something that I am trying to change. There's this concept of Therapist being a ‘ blank Slate’ and although I never truly believed in this because I´m Black and Queer and know I will always bring myself and my experiences into the therapy room with me to an extent- I did feel like there were/ are many aspects of myself and life I had to keep private to maintain an air of “professionalism”. I always struggled with how to navigate this balance between personal life and professional life and felt that what I was sharing and creating felt superficial because it left out so much of myself.  While working in the queer and bipoc communities I found this exceptionally challenging because then I was in the situation where I was creating a distance between myself and the same people I wanted to be in community with. It's exhausting and isolating to keep up this facade  when a whirlwind of life is going on behind the scenes.

Being a Black and Queer Therapist in Berlin is also a hard place to be because I don't often see therapists who look like me, in reality I don't know any other Black and Queer therapists. I barely know other Black OR Queer Therapists so I've often felt isolated in the field and that feeling of isolation spread to my personal life here in berlin. Instagram and the internet  hav been a blessing because I get to see others like me and feel a little less alone.It has allowed me to learn from and be inspired by people like me doing this kind of work. So in coming back to social media this is my attempt at sharing more of myself in an attempt to connect with others and hopefully inspire others to do the same because at the end of the day Therapist and real and imperfect people.

The past few months

Between being kicked out of my last flat with little notice, dealing with strained familial relationships and the never ending struggle of trying to find secure housing in Berlin, things have been challenging to say the least. I realized that I had been coasting in this state of emotional burnout for so long I had become accustomed to it. I started my private practice at the beginning of 2020 and worked continuously throughout the pandemic and lockdowns with little to no breaks from client work. I was drained me emotionally and I began feeling very detached from my work. There weren't many things nurturing me and yet I was still trying my best to show up for my clients. Although I was dealing with burnout I was still training as a doula, learning about birthwork and stepping into the world of supporting clients in the this way, doing continual professional development, training and certifying in EMDR Psychotherapy , investing in SEO to understand more about how to grow my business and reach the clients and organizations I want to be working with all while running on below E. At the beginning of this year I started to realize that I was doing so much with so little energy and I was really beginning to lose my sense of direction. 

 I started slowing things down, I stopped my private practice, I stopped accepting new Doula clients and finally I decided to take a break from IG. I could not take a full stop because this is the world we live in and bills still needed to be paid, but I am grateful that I was able to take this time and space to ground and recenter and get back in alignment with my values and the reasons I am doing this work. I spent a lot of time with myself and got comfortable with this. I worked on building presence and trying not to let myself be overcome by worry. I spent a lot of time crocheting and exploring my creativity in ways I had never done before, listening to  a lot of audio books, eating, healing my body and my relationship to my body by doing dance fitness classes, and joining a school to learn contortion, finding a regular sleep schedule and listening to a lot of yoga nidra. I  tried to embrace time to just be. I think this time was really long overdue— I needed to take some time, slow things down and really think about how I want to move forward in my life and in my business. I still don't have it all figured out but here I am anyway, a little more energetic and a little more enthusiastic about making it up as I go along.

Me X Social Media

I have always had a hard time with social media and felt that when I made my ‘return to Instagram’ I needed to have this perfect content strategy planned out, and post 3 xs per day so I could grow my following by X percent and felt completely overwhelmed by it. Maybe it is also my Virgo tendency to strive for perfection. But then I tried to remind myself that it doesn't need to be perfect, it just needs to be done.

So even though I do not have the perfect content strategy I am starting somewhere. I plan to use my social media presence as a place to share more about Mental Health and Wellness, focussing on  Psychodynamic Counselling, EMDR, Yoga and Yoga Nidra and how these things can help to improve wellbeing and quality of life.I also want to use it as a space to share my work and hopefully connect with others. I have some collaborations that I am working on that I am excited and nervous about. I will be working with EOTO throughout the summer offering some group sessions on different topics on mental health within  Black and Queer Communities. I will also be offering some outdoor yoga sessions with them later in the summer.

 I will be working with Hydra to offer crisis counselling and EMDR to SWers in Berlin at no cost to them, and I will also be starting my Private practice again this time with more of a focus on EMDR and using this to support those who have C/PTSD or Trauma.

 I have a lot of ideas and am interested in many things so I am doing my best to pace myself as I begin this new chapter. I want this to be sustainable and I am trying to practice patience - I would love to be able to offer a regular yoga class for BIPOc online or in person, I have this professional podcast mic from my Convos with Kemoy era that I would like to put to use recording yoga nidra scripts for the community, and would like to get back to hosting a regular support group for BIPOC queers. When i started my IG I wanted it to be a space to connect with others interested in Queer BIPOC mental health and wellness, and to foster some sense of community, I wanted it to be a place where I could share more of what I have learned and am continuously learning with yall so that you could benefit from it in the ways that I have and this is what I want to get back to.  I am constantly inspired by those around me and more than anything I want to inspire others to rest, to learn how to care for themselves, how to nurture relationships and foster a sense of community, and most importantly unlearning the patterns of thoughts and behaviors that might leave you feeling stuck, hurt or unsure of yourself. These are things that I am still learning how to do and I hope that we can go on this journey of learning and self discovery together.

The Transformative Power of Yoga Nidra

My introduction to Yoga Nidra

I recently completed a course in yoga nidra online through My vinyasa Practice, based in the US. I had practised yoga Nidra in the past and I was grateful that I had the opportunity to take a deeper dive into the topic and learn more about its origins, how it works, and its benefits. I have realised that many people are unaware that Yoga Nidra exists and, and even more so, its benefits. This was transformative for me so I wanted to share this with my clients and everyone I know! I think some may be surprised to find out that although Yoga Nidra is an ancient tantric practice, Psychotherapist Richard Miller has brought Psychology into the formular and developed a specific type of Yoga Nidra scripts, viRest Yoga Nidra, with the aim of treating symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Of course, this post is only the briefest of introductions into yoga Nidra and I encourage you to do more research if it is something you are interested in.

More about Yoga Nidra: https://youtu.be/qHIVoiwgJVQ

What is Yoga Nidra?

Yoga Nidra also known as Yogic Sleep is a form of guided meditation used to access alternate states of consciousness. The true aim in the practice is not to fall asleep but rather to reach and maintain this sweet spot in-between sleeping and waking consciousness.

Yoga Nidra is closely tied to the Koshas system– in the session the instructor will guide you through each of the layers of the Koshas system; physical , breath, emotional, intellectual and bliss. Through this process we are able to down regulate the nervous system by moving from the thinking mind into a more subtle awareness of our experience, progressively quieting the mind; this is done through the use of breath and body awareness techniques. Research has proven that through the practice of Yoga Nidra brain moves shift into different states. When you begin a Yoga Nidra session, your brain is generally in an active state of beta waves. As you start to slow down and press pause on your day a transitional experience occurs when you are able to shift into an alpha state-the brain wave frequency that links conscious thought with the subconscious mind.

How do you practise?

Yoga Nidra is often offered in studio settings, or online, either alone or paired with yin yoga; Sessions can last between 30-90 mins, but timing can vary largely. It is believed that one hour of yoga nidra is equivalent to four hours of deep sleep in terms of energy and health, and it can be helpful in alleviating exhaustion and fatigue. During the practice of yoga nidra you would typically be lying down. Maybe with a small rolled blanket under the knees and an eye mask, to elevate the experience, if you feel comfortable doing so. I find that this helps me to turn my attention inward and minimise distraction. The instructor would begin to guide you through a meditation following a specific script. The scripts may vary depending on the person teaching and the type of yoga nidra they are teaching; there are 3 main types of yoga nidra: Deep relaxation by Nishla joy Devi, iRest yoga nidra developed by Richard Miller and traditional approach by Swami Satyananda Saraswati. Like I said, even though we want to try not to fall asleep, it is absolutely fine if you do! With practice you will be able to stay present with the meditation and reach the state of Turiya

What are the benefits?

In its simplest form , yoga nidra is a relaxing practice that allows you time to be quiet with yourself. We can take the time we need to give attention to mental stressors as well as physical sensations present in the body. It allows us space and time to get out of the thinking mind into subtler states of being. Visiting these places where the thoughts are less has a long lasting effect. With practice you will become skilled at quieting the mind and being intune with what is present in the body.

If you are interested in trying Yoga Nidra and seeing what it is like for yourself, you can always find Yoga Nidra guided meditations on any platform where you listen to music to hear an example of what it is like. If you are feeling ready to practice in person you can join me at Vea studios in Kreuzberg for a few Sundays September where I will be hosting yin and yoga nidra sessions perfect for beginners, and I hope to have a prenatal and nidra class coming soon.

Hope to see you on the mat sometime!

Transforming trauma: a qualitative feasibility study of integrative restoration (iRest) yoga Nidra on combat-related post-traumatic stress disorder (Stankovic L, 2011)

‘This eight-week study examined the feasibility of offering weekly classes in Integrative Restoration (iRest), a form of mindfulness meditation, to military combat veterans at a community mental health agency in the San Francisco Bay Area. Participants were 16 male combat veterans (15 Vietnam War and 1 Iraq War) of mixed ethnicity, aged 41 to 66 years, suffering from posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The 11 participants who completed the study reported reduced rage, anxiety, and emotional reactivity, and increased feelings of relaxation, peace, self-awareness, and self-efficacy, despite challenges with mental focus, intrusive memories, and other concerns. All participants reported they would have attended ongoing iRest classes at the agency approximately once per week.’

Online Doula Support

People often ask me ‘ what exactly IS a Doula?’ So I thought it was fitting to make my first blog post about my Doula work, especially what my work as an online Doula looks like. In the age of COVID 19 lockdowns one of the many lessons we learned as a society was about access. All of a sudden everything was available online which made it easily accessible for anyone with access to the internet and a computer. This also shaped the way that many professionals worked; services that were traditionally only available face to face like Psychotherapy and Doula support were now suddenly able to expand and take a new shape through the use of technology. This is something that I have integrated into my practice and that I will continue to offer so that I am able to work with clients in Berlin and Beyond. So if you have wanted to work with me but don't live in Berlin keep reading to learn more about my remote services!

What is a Doula and the benefits of having one?

A Birth Doula is a non medical professional who offers, emotional, psychological and practical support around pregnancy, birth and sometimes postpartum. As Full Spectrum Doula this means that I support birth as well as other topics in reproductive health including fertility support, loss or miscarriage, abortion as well as Transition support for Black Trans people. Part of why I decided to offer my services online so that they would be available to Black, POC, Queer and Trans parents wherever they may be. In the rest of this post I will speak primarily about online Birth Doula services but if you are interested in any of the other forms of support please contact me and we can discuss together what this can look like. I'll say how below!

If you're interested in learning more about the benefits of having a Doula check out the Doula & Yoga page on my website for links to articles saying more on this.

How does this work online?

So as an online or remote Doula, my services are essentially the same as in person, the major difference being that we would meet online via zoom or google meets. We could work together wherever you may be based in the world and during our online prenatal sessions we would solidify a birth plan, discuss pain management, comfort measures for labor and delivery. We also make space to address all of your questions and concerns and wishes surrounding labor, delivery, and newborn care. I would also support you in arranging adequate postpartum care or supporting you in finding a postpartum doula in your area. I also offer the possibility to be available to you virtually for your labor and delivery- in this way I would be able to provide you with company, guidance and support when labor were to begin. We can always discuss together how much support you feel you may need. My yoga work is also offered online so we would be able to have bother pre and postnatal 1-1 yoga classes together. A new part of my work focuses primarily on supporting perinatal mental health through the use of EMDR for clients who have experienced trauma related to birth or otherwise. If you are pregnant and interested in Doula and Mental Health support this could be a unique offer for you that would online be accessible to you online - if you are outside of Berlin

Why would I do this?

There are so many reason why someone might choose to work with a Doula online

• Your favorite IG Doula does not live in your city

• You live in a rural area with limited resources

• You are part of a Queer family looking for inclusive and /or Queer support

• Maybe you have limited mobility or time in your schedule to make space to meet a Doula in person.

• You have chronic illness that makes meeting online easier

And these are just to name a few! Whether you choose to work with a Doula in person or online, the benefits are just the same.

How do I find a Doula?

If you are interested in working online with me be sure to go to the section about my ‘Doula & Yoga’ services page and book a free 30 minute introduction call. There we can get to know each other and discuss what birth support could look like for you. If you are looking for a Doula in your area, I would suggest looking for referrals by speaking to people in your network and hearing their recommendations. Maybe a more detailed blog post on this soon!

Can't wait to connect with you!